Weary Traveler, Seeking Something

Being constantly on the move is both exhilarating and exhausting. When 2011 passes and the tail end of 2012 rolls around I will most likely have averaged 2 changes of country/continent over the previous three years. That’s on top of the current statistics of 5 years, 4 countries, and 3 continents since 2006.

Granted, I’ve found myself as a semi-permanent frequenter of Baltimore, San Francisco, Gothenburg, and Seoul—but if nothing else, I have come to realize that things will never be the same when you return to a previously familiar place. Time goes by, people come and go, lives change, and without amended or preferably abolished expectations, one can find themselves in quite the surprised and unhappy spot.

In fact, recently I’ve given a lot of thought to the concept of expectations and on the whole find them entirely inadequate and quite dangerous. For one, they project your naive opinion upon a situation that is yet to exist, often based upon previous experiences or hearsay from second and third-hand sources. Beyond that, expectations set the stage for disappointment which a really excellent way to put a damper on things very quickly. And my final elaboration: expectations create a mental road block towards accepting the reality that we are presented with.

Therefore, wandering back into a city that feels like an old friend can still be refreshing and exhausting at the same time. Repeat that more times than you can count on your hands at once and you may start to find fatigue.

Even quite recently I’ve imagined myself as a life long wanderluster, casually grazing the earth for adventures as they are presented to me. At the moment I’m starting to feel a bit worn out, not ready or even feeling able to slow down but starting to accept that stumbling upon somewhere/something/someone to help tie things all together and to exist in a more stable life would be quite welcome.

For the time being, Sweden is where I am with Finland, Germany, USA and Korea appearing to be the steps in place that will all lead back here by winter. Sounds like quite the whirlwind but I’m still looking forward to it all.

Onwards and ever upwards…